A confession

It's sort of more of an admission, but I'd like to share it with you.

When I set up this blog, I told myself that it was a marketing strategy, a way of connecting with a broader audience, an easy platform for creative expression, a simple way of exploring LOA ideas, a way to engage a wider audience... I had lots of reasons to set up this blog but I really did not admit that the real reason I set up this blog was to make more money.

I learned everything I could about blogging, a fast as I could, so I could start raking in the big buckeroos. But of course this felt dirty and treacherous to me, so I disguised it with the more comfortable ideas of connection and marketing. But really I had this undercurrent of fear that was driving me. Fear of needing to make the business work, fear of failing, fear of being a bad businessperson, and so on. Passive revenue through blogging seemed like a fast and easy answer to it all.

Well no one can fool the Universe even they can easily fool themselves! I really tried to believe that I was 'over' the money thing, the fear of not having enough, of needing to manifest more of it. But obviously it was a strong recurring pattern - a habit I had just not kicked yet.

Like I said, the Universe does not ignore vibration, no matter what my head was trying to tell me. I was radiating the vibe of 'need more money and why doesn't it happen sooner' and sure enough that was what I attracted back: a dazzling result of 14cents from this blog in the last three months. (LOL) Boy oh boy what a lesson!

A funny thing happened through it all. I actually started to enjoy the blogging process. It is an easy way to post ideas, photos, and bits and bobs. I really enjoy cruising around the blogosphere and making new connections. It's been really cool learning new technological stuff.

I've let go of needing to make money with my blog. It's a lot more personal to me now. It is a way of fulfilling my passion: of writing and learning. It's fun!

My intentions are the same: to attract diverse streams of income through providing good quality services, while having fun. Whether this comes from the blog or through other means - I'll leave that up to the Universe. So far the Universe has done a pretty smashing job for me: I've had extra revenue from public speaking, new clients, affiliate sales, product sales, Adsense, and even selling my canoe for way more than I had hoped for. I had been so fixated on blogging being the answer, I was blind to all the other answers that were flooding in elsewhere. I am not so hung up on the outcome though that I forget the process - fun is the key ingredient for me.

I have also developed more awareness of how wealth actually flows and appears in a variety of ways. I notice and appreciate all the small gifts like the extra free 30 minutes I got on the parking meter yesterday, or the change I found in the garage, to the really big things that flood in, like a job offer that will more than double our income overnight. How cool is that?!

This old money pattern is deep one, and it has been a long process of self-discovery and re-education. Like a flower unfurling in the springtime, I am learning delightful new layers of complexity. Always more to learn! It is a liberating process.

So I am reviewing all the features of my blog and removing the bits that feel icky and desperate, as per that old money vibe thing. Anything to do with money exchange has got to have a clean vibe: one that feels fun, genuine, and in the interest of further personal growth for all.

The ads will stay. I actually find they add value - they list some pretty neat things there. The donation thing will go - doesn't feel quite right. Probably because I wouldn't donate money myself to a donation request form on a blog! I would however send a gift or something else to appreciate someone's blogging efforts. Or at least leave a comment. That all feels good.

If you've got some feedback or experienced something similar, I'd love to hear from you.

In the meantime, may good stuff flow your way.

Zoe